What Happens To Our Children When We Die? Maine Man Killed Himself and Adult Autistic Son in 2010

"Ginger Taylor  commented on the pressures on families with autism and on the greatest fear of many parents of autistic children: "That is the big question -- what happens to our child when we die. .... We understand their needs better than anyone else. It really breaks my heart hearing what happened to this family. It shouldn't be like that.""

The Portland Press Herald , April 28, 2010

The recent murder and attempted murder/suicide cases involving mothers and their children with severe autism disorders are not the first such tragedies to occur.  Unfortunately the same patterns are unfolding ... the refusal to seriously address the need for decent, humane residential care and treatment facilities for adults with severe autism disorders continues,  the attempts by the TPGA and other ND groups like the ASAN corporation to suppress any discussion of the harsh realities of severe autism disorders and the effects on those who suffer from them and their families are continuing.  No one is speaking about what has to be done to help the severely autistic live a decent life for fear of being subjected to irrational accusations that to do so is akin to excusing or justifying the killings.  David H. Gorski, TPGA ideologues Emily Willingham, Shannon des Roches Rosa, ASAN corporation's Ari Ne'eman and blogger Matt Carey have all been eager to attack Sharyl Atkisson and CBS for daring to portray some of the harsh realities that affected Alex Spourdalakis and his mother.

Television (Big Bang Theory, any number of Criminal Minds police investigative type shows)  and the mainstream media generally, other than CBS and  Sharyl Atkisson and a few other honest conscientious reporters, will continue to portray autism as a quirky, brilliant set of personality traits, an alternative way of thinking. The majority of autistic adults and ALL severely autistic adults will continue to live in varying levels of residential care IF they are lucky. But if no one provides humane services, help and hope to the families and persons living with severe autism challenges nothing will change and the tragedies will continue.  The TGPA and ASAN corporate crowd can pretend otherwise but we have to speak up now and provide service now to prevent further tragedies.  We know this because it has happened before and nothing was done.  Below is my blog comment from 2010 concerning the man in Gray, Maine who shot and killed himself and his 22 year old autistic son:

Dennis Hoey of  The Portland Press Herald  reports that a man in Gray, Maine shot and killed himself and his 22 year old autistic son yesterday:

"A father shot and killed his autistic son Tuesday at their home on Yarmouth Road before turning the rifle on himself, Maine State Police said. Cumberland County sheriff's deputies found the bodies of Daniel McLatchie, 44, and his son, Benjamin McLatchie, 22, in the family's driveway at 227 Yarmouth Road around 2:30 p.m.  ... State police Sgt. Chris Harriman said ...  it appeared that Daniel McLatchie was upset about what would happen to his autistic son after he and his wife died. He was a stay-at-home father, Harriman said. Daniel McLatchie's wife, Allison McLatchie, 45, was at work when the shootings happened."

Ginger Taylor the Maine author of the Adventures in Autism blog, and herself the mother of an autistic son, was interviewed and  notes the lack of services including counseling services for families with autistic children.  Ms Taylor commented on the pressures on families with autism and on the greatest fear of many parents of autistic children:

"That is the big question -- what happens to our child when we die. .... We understand their needs better than anyone else. It really breaks my heart hearing what happened to this family. It shouldn't be like that."

Many people will undoubtedly condemn Daniel McLatchie for taking his son's life.   Some will call for more services.   Few, if any, will take the real action necessary to ensure that people  with autism disorders like Benjamin McLatchie have a decent place to live when their parents are dead.    

Few, during Autism Awareness Month, and certainly not Hollywood or the main stream media giants, will look beyond the  accomplishments of a few High Functioning media celebrity "autistics" to  even acknowledge the existence of severely autistic persons living desperate lives in institutional facilities.  Even fewer will acknowledge, without mocking or attacking them, the fears of parents  obsessed with worry about what will happen to their children after they die. 

In the end, whether it is at the hands of a distraught parent, or from life in prison like, psychiatric hospitals, it is the most vulnerable, the most severely affected by autism disorders who suffer from lack of reality based autism awareness and support services.

Autism Dangers Result in Lives Lost to Autism

In Jabberwocky of the Day : Don't Speak Ill of Autism  MJ  has provided a clear and concise picture of the dangers that often accompany autism disorders.  He did so in response to a comment by Kevin Leitch, aka Kev,  at LBRB who has criticized Ginger Taylor for launching a new site called Lives Lost to Autism.  Mr. Leitch has a long history of romanticizing "autism" and criticizing anyone who views autism disorders as   ...  disorders.  I agree with MJ's critique of Kev's views as "just plain silly" in so far as they complain of unfairness to "autism" a mental disorder, not an entity or person. In describing the dangers that accompany autism disorders MJ states:

"Autism is not a good thing and has in fact directly caused many deaths.


Let me put it this way, if someone dies as a direct result of being shot would you try to claim that it was the bullet and not the person pulling the trigger that is to blame? In a similar fashion, autism robs people of abilities or facilities that they would normally be expected to have and it is this lack that can directly lead to death.


Autism can prevent children from understanding their environment and that lack of understanding can very easily be fatal. Autism can easily prevent people from being able to understand what effect their actions have on others and thus lead to their deaths. This likely happened in the case of Sky Walker - do you think he killed his mother or was it his autism that lead to her death?


I have seen many attempts to whitewash the spectrum but this one takes the cake".

I have added the bold emphasis in the above quote.  I have commented several times on this site of the time when my son Conor  left our home without me realizing he had gone. I had received a business call and was on the phone when he left. I thought I would hear him if he went out but I was wrong. When the call ended and I looked for Conor he was nowhere to be found.  I ran around our house and yard before calling 911 and being directed to a nearby convenience store. He had crossed a busy parking lot and street oblivious to the dangers of automobile traffic before a good citizen stopped and took him to the convenience store and safety.  As the adult responsible for him that day I felt intense fear and guilt that I will never, ever forget. Conor, because of his autistic disorder, does not understand and appreciate the many dangers of our everyday environment.  Autism is very, very dangerous for many autistic children.

In starting the Lives Lost to Autism site Ginger Taylor is performing a valuable service to autistic children and their families reminding us of the very dangerous realities that often accompany autism disorders.Thank you Ms Taylor. And thank you MJ for your clear statement about the realities of autism dangers. Kev, well, you have a good day Kev, And may you someday wake up and quit romanticizing autism disorders.

NOTE: Since publishing this comment I have also read, and recommend, Wade Rankin's discussion of this matter at LOST LIVES, CRIMINAL INDIFFERENCE, AND HYPOCRISY.  

Maine Man Shoots and Kills Autistic Son and Himself

Dennis Hoey of  The Portland Press Herald  reports that a man in Gray, Maine shot and killed himself and his 22 year old autistic son yesterday:

"A father shot and killed his autistic son Tuesday at their home on Yarmouth Road before turning the rifle on himself, Maine State Police said. Cumberland County sheriff's deputies found the bodies of Daniel McLatchie, 44, and his son, Benjamin McLatchie, 22, in the family's driveway at 227 Yarmouth Road around 2:30 p.m.  ... State police Sgt. Chris Harriman said ...  it appeared that Daniel McLatchie was upset about what would happen to his autistic son after he and his wife died. He was a stay-at-home father, Harriman said. Daniel McLatchie's wife, Allison McLatchie, 45, was at work when the shootings happened."

Ginger Taylor the Maine author of the Adventures in Autism blog, and herself the mother of an autistic son, was interviewed and  notes the lack of services including counseling services for families with autistic children.  Ms Taylor commented on the pressures on families with autism and on the greatest fear of many parents of autistic children:

"That is the big question -- what happens to our child when we die. .... We understand their needs better than anyone else. It really breaks my heart hearing what happened to this family. It shouldn't be like that."

Many people will undoubtedly condemn Daniel McLatchie for taking his son's life.   Some will call for more services.   Few, if any, will take the real action necessary to ensure that people  with autism disorders like Benjamin McLatchie have a decent place to live when their parents are dead.    

Few, during Autism Awareness Month, and certainly not Hollywood or the main stream media giants, will look beyond the  accomplishments of a few High Functioning media celebrity "autistics" to  even acknowledge the existence of severely autistic persons living desperate lives in institutional facilities.  Even fewer will acknowledge, without mocking or attacking them, the fears of parents  obsessed with worry about what will happen to their children after they die. 


In the end, whether it is at the hands of a distraught parent, or from life in prison like, psychiatric hospitals, it is the most vulnerable, the most severely affected by autism disorders who suffer from lack of reality based autism awareness and support services.