Conor walking the North Riverfront Trail along the St John River, Fredericton
Many in the Neurodiversity cult, which irrationally embraces and worships the autism segment of the autism disorder diagnosis they sought for themselves, or their children, while discarding the DISORDER component of that label have, once again, attacked parents and other family members who dare to counter their perverse, ill informed ideology with honest depictions of their own kids autism disorders. Suzanne Wright's recent, honest, accurate, depiction of the challenges faced by so many with autism disorders and their families, has sent the autism cultists into what Autism Jabberwocky has called a collective conniption. Among the usual hate filled, knee jerk reactions is the allegation that family members, including parents, who talk honestly about the autism disorders they experience are describing the ND cultists' kids as monsters. In truth it is only the ND cultists, those who praise autism as an Einstein like gift, who use the term monster in describing their autistic children.
On this comment I am posting two sets of pictures (1) showing the joy we call Conor and (2) showing some of the harm inflicted by his autism DISORDER . I have posted most of these pictures before and I don't expect the ND cult mongers who praise and misrepresent autism as a gift to actually pay attention to such evidence. They presume to know more about my son than I do. For those, however, whose minds have not been frozen and locked forever in the Neurodiversity cult that worships here are these two sets of pictures which showns the realities of life with out son, the joy of Conor and the harm he suffers from his autism DISORDER. I believe the joy pictures speak for themselves. The harm pictures will include a brief explanatory description.
(1) The Joy of Conor
(1) The Joy of Conor
(2) The Harm of Conor's Autism Disorder
Conor engages in Self Injurious Behavior,
including biting his hands and wrists.
Conor has put his hands through glass windows and has to be
watched closely when he is upset to ensure he does not do so again.
Conor's Self Injurious Behaviors include hitting himself in the head when frustrated/having a meltdown. The picture above resulted from an incident at 3 am when Conor was hitting himself in the head with considerable force. I tried diversion strategies unsuccessfully and tried to grab his arms to prevent him from injuring himself. He is much quicker than his old Dad and lunged forward and bit me on the bicep, biting through the skin and into the muscle resulting in the bruise above and calcium buildup. NO he was not trying to injure me, it was an example of what Dr. Sanjay Gupta called Reactive Aggression.
Conor is very sensitive to noises usually the type of noise rather than the volume. Some telephones ringing and some cars and motorcycle noises will set him off. We use mobile phones in our home almost exclusively now because Conor has ripped the cords of our land lines out of the walls so many times.
Conor, like a substantial number of the 50% of the autism spectrum who also have an intellectual disability also suffers from epileptic seizures. He suffered two grand mal seizures requiring attendance by ambulance at the Emergency room. He ALSO suffered an adverse reaction to his medication which almost took his life and resulted in 2 weeks in hospital including 6 days in the ICU. (Thanks again to the wonderful ICU Team at the Chalmers Hospital!)
10 years ago when we lived on Hillcourt Dr. above, just behind the parking lot of the Red Lantern pub marked above on the Google earth map, Conor wandered out of the house unnoticed. Heather was in Nova Scotia and I answered the phone on a business call. When the call ended Conor was nowhere to be seen. After a frantic 911 call I recovered him from the Ultrasound gas station/convenience store on the corner of Main and Fulton above. Conor had crossed the busy parking lot of the Red Lantern Pub and also crossed a busy Saturday afternoon Main St. Traffic was stopping to avoid hitting him and a good Frederictonian stopped his truck to take him to the Ultramar and alert 911.
I love my son dearly and I owe it to him to speak honestly about the autism disorder which limits his ability to function in this world and limits his life prospects. I will not misrepresent the nature of his autism disorder to make myself feel good. I will fight all those who do misrepresent autism disorders as gifts. That is a promise I make to all including those at ASAN, TPGA and others who misrepresent autism to the world.
8 comments:
Thank you, Harold, for explaining the issues. Parents who love their children will work to maximize their quality of life and potential. Parents who love their children will work hard to minimize the physical illnesses, discomfort and pain that may lead to acting out. Parents who love their children may sometimes get frustrated from dealing with disruption or expense, or grieve when their children suffer. If someone else's autism is simple and pain-free, then they should rejoice and refrain from criticizing others less fortunate. Or maybe they could reach out to provide physical assistance to families overwhelmed by caregiving responsibilities.
Harold, I was so shocked by the comments that followed that piece that I wrote a post about it. Unbelievable! A good family writes a hard-truth story and they get eaten alive by the neurodiversity bunch. I was appalled. They flooded the comments!
Thank you for sharing this. I have also been accused of not loving my son when I have spoken out against this whole ND cultish movement. I too love my son immensely, but I do NOT love a disorder that can wreak so much havoc on him. I find it appalling really. Do parents of mentally ill children say things like "I just love bipolar disorder!" "We love schizophrenia! We would not change our kids for anything." Heck no they don't! It is silly to profess love for a disorder that causes our kids to go through hell and back. But yet, I am called all kinds of horrible names when I say things like "I hate this disorder".
hi Harold...I've never commented here because I live in another corner of the blogosphere. But I want to thank you for this incredibly powerful and educational post. I don't know anyone with autism, but I help take care of a mentally ill friend. So I know what you mean when you say love the person, hate the disorder. Your son looks like a beautiful person. And your true love shines through. All the best to all of you...
There is nothing "wonderful" about autism. It sucks royally... daily. Both ends of the spectrum. Even snuggled up with my severe one (the other hates being touched) on the sofa - me reading, him playing on the iPad - I never forget it. He will forever be in care. I will have to beg my entire life for sufficient supports/funding and housing. He will never marry, never go places on his own, never buy anything on a whim....
Disability is a disability. Claiming otherwise does those that are disabled no help what so ever. It simply cuts funding and supports.
Yes, he's amazing and he makes friends everywhere... but to deprive him of the chance of independence through research into meds, therapies etc... Is simply mean and self absorbed.
One day I hope he advocates for himself and can tell those that keep trying to keep him quiet and ignored... to go shove it... and not politely.
I agree completely. My son is a few years younger, but our worlds are similar. I love my son, but I hate autism! I was reading some of those judgmental comments (that appear to have no idea what autism, more specifically the symptoms that it defines, is really like) to my wife in near disbelief. They should be greatful for what they have and keep their ignorance to themselves!
My 18 year old with the same sort of autism has developed epilepsy. He's on epilim clonazapam and clobazam. Have you had any of these prescribed for your son? Which tabs caused adverse reactions for Connor. Do you think tablets help short term? How long do we have to keep trying these drugs for?
Hello Bernie I am not a doctor. I can only say that my son Conor had serious adverse reactions to Dilantin and Lamotrogine (both of which are documented by health care professionals). He has been using Clobazam for some time and it has not had any obvious adverse effects but it has also not prevented his grand mal seizures entirely.
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